tonight was fun, going to Caffe Espresso and having a girls' night in watching Bridget Jones's Diary for the 10th time or so. AND....I ran into whatshisface...Mike :P But I'm proud of myself for being civil but not overly anxious. Shelly and Tricia were helpful as a calming effect. But...why did he have to lean so damn close?! damn him! to remind me of how comfy it is to hug him? grrrrr Although I can't say that would be top on my list of what I'd like to do to him...grrrrr I still have to urge to slap him. ::sigh:: I suppose that will pass in time--though it hasn't yet. At least I didn't act out my anger, even though I still had it. At the same time of course, I was genuinely curious to know what's going on in his life, even if I really don't want to hear it all. That's the paradox I guess--part of me wants to be friends with him for some good conversations....and part of me wants to kick his ass out of my life. I know which part is the smart part.

UGH....it certainly would be easier if I could fall for someone else. I'm working on it...but it's not exactly something 1) I want to rush into and 2) that I can just instantly feel something--I've realized I just don't work that way...though I admit I do feel Something for Scotty, even if I can't quite identify what it is yet. Too soon to be too serious, but strong enough to be something to consider. I just wish I wasn't so messed up still. It's really damn annoying to have these fleeting thoughts about my summer fling, Mike, other random people along the way and even stupid Brandon. Of course, it's stupid to think that I can just forget about my past either....it will always be there, just a matter of thinking in a new perspective.

And so, I have to just breath in, breath out, calm down and look forward to a call from Scotty tomorrow. If he doesn't call, well then, he doesn't call and I work from there. I have patience, but certainly little patience for someone who does not have time for me...'bout damn time I learn that ;) I guess that's one of the things that sort of dating around has taught me--you don't have to settle. Not that a person should be nitpicky and bitchy, but there's a point when you have to keep some standards. I'll have none of this dating for the sake of dating shit, nope, nah uh, not again. ....let's all just hope that all this schtuff I've been writing about I actually take to heart, hm?

On an related but different note...it's really amazing what you can learn about yourself and others from a few hours of GOOD conversation. Tricia and Shelly, you guys rock--if I was a guy or gay, I'd date ya ;) But, since I'm not and you're not...I'll just keep on enjoying chilling with the fun friends ya are;) Sorry sometimes if I get wrapped up in my own thing....I guess we're all self-absorbed sometimes. Remember to kick my ass sometimes when I need to shut up ;) hehehe Anyways, I should get some sleep. Here's hoping for a happy new year for all! :)

well, I didn't feel a lot better the next day, but I feel a lot better now. stupid flu. Anyways, tonight I went out with good friends to the bars downtown. Overall it was actually a pretty good day:

*got to sleep in
*watched tv with my parents
*took a leisurely bath
*took my time getting ready
*did a few odd things around the house
*talked online for a while
*made a HUGE snowman with Tricia--let's just say, it's taller than us and we had to use a self-made ramp out of a ladder, wheelbarrow and board to get the body on top of the base. It kicks ass ;) and my mom enjoyed the whole thing so much that she took pictures and helped out a bit.
*had some hot cocoa and fairly good leftovers
*Jenny W came over and we watched LOTR--the extended DVD version, which was nifty--I wish they had just made one big version though :P
*Shelly drove over too and all of us went out downtown and played some darts (Shelly and I kicked some ass...though it DID take FOREVER for the game to end--in fact, the game ended before we were quite done, since it only lets you have 30 rounds but oh well)
*got home and now I have time to blog

So yeah, nothing really very grand or anything....though it WAS a good time making fun of some people we went to high school/grade school with that we saw out at the bars. It was sooooo tempting to throw a dart over at Maria's head...but I resisted. Besides, knowing my luck, I probably would have missed and hit some hottie in the eyeball instead :P Oh well, such is life. Thus far, vacation isn't really too bad. It's been surprisingly relaxing. I'm sure some of that will end tomorrow when I help my brother Scott with some of his moving into his new apartment. And then there's the whole New Year's and Scotty thing. And then Aruba. Yeah, it's going to start getting busy, but I really can't complain.

The only thing that only VERY slightly bothers me is that I haven't talked to Mike. Now DON'T panic! I'm not regressing or anything (at least, not in that department). It's just that I saw him online once, but he wasn't on long and he didn't IM. THat wouldn't be strange except he was on a screen name that I'm fairly certain he only created to talk to me--it's possible there's more than one use or maybe he plans on switching to it, but since I've only seen him on there that once, it seems unlikely that he's using it. Did I write about talking to Mike yet? Hm, maybe, maybe not...I don't feel like scrolling to try and find an entry.

I'll summarize: a few weeks back, Mike IMed cuz he heard that I saw him at the bars and that if I had actually run into him, I would have thrown my drink at him and slapped him (or perhaps punched him) in the face and then walked away. He didn't like that idea too much...I don't think he realized how very very very angry he made me and that I was still angry--he wouldn't have many ways of knowing cuz I didn't talk about him much with his friends and I hadn't talked to him at all since that stupid night in October. Anyways, so he IMed and he apologized for being an ass and blah blah blah and he just wants things to be civil. Though I have to say, I'm proud of the way I made the majority of the conversation rough on him, I did in the end tell him that I would resist the temptation to physically hurt him if I see him again, though I couldn't promise I wouldn't verbally abuse him....just too tempting. I also told him that I wasn't sure I could handle being his friend again...at least not yet.

So, I'm sure that's why he's keeping a strong distance. I know it's stupid to even think about trying to be friends with him, but sometimes it is kind of a pain knowing that I can't talk to him. It's also a real pain in the ass knowing he has $45 worth of books of mine! He has my 3rd ed. AD&D players handbook AND he has my Sea of Swords novel which I would VERY much like back. I know I need to just go over there and take it...but it just seems so....out of the way. And it means having to see him...unless I can manage to arrrange for swiping them when he's out and his friends (who are also my friends, though it's not like we regularly hang out) are in.

::sigh:: sounds like a mission....well, perhaps I am up for a mission this week ;) we shall see...we shall see ;)

feelin a bit better :) maybe tomorrow I'll be much better and able to actually make a sizable blog entry. Until then!

ick....I feel....ick. I haven't been this sick in a long time :( When will it end?!!!! Wish me luck trying to get rid of whatever stomach flu bug I picked up! please :\

We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year! ...well, maybe not "we" but "I" do ;) Have a great holiday season, weather you celebrate the Christian holiday, Jewish holiday (of course that's already past, but still) or any other holiday variety. Busy with family and friends for the last few days and for perhaps the next few--we shall see. Later :)

Back home. Today I went with my parents to see my grandparents and an assorted variety of other relatives for an early Christmas celebration. It wasn't too bad, except for the part about driving from EC at 8:30am today after staying up til 2:30am with Mandy. The food was good and it was nice seeing some of my cousins, especially since the younger ones get a kick out of having me play games with them. There was a time when I used to play with them, when I was about their age and they were just toddlers, but then I didn't see them for a while--I was too cool for them and they were too cool for me or what have you. Now it's just the right age to start actually having conversations with the oldest of the young cousins and first cousins once removed, which is kind of nice since I happen to fall in this inbetween age with having cousins more my older brothers' ages or almost ten years younger. So I was never really close to any of my cousins, though two of them actually went to EC, but only one was there when I was there and he graduated the same year I started. There was always just too much distance between us for us to see each other between holidays.

...I tell you though, it's kind of a pain blogging at home :P I should wait til they go to bed or something, but that's annoying...oh well. Guess I gotta be sneaky about it. I just don't feel like having them looking at my journal, you know? Oh, it could be worse--it's not like I say EVERYTHING in here and it's not like I've been really all that exciting that they would really care, but still, it's one of those things a kid just doesn't want to share with her parents. So, I suppose I'll just write later. See ya.

Yes, Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers rocked. I was very much impressed. Granted, there were some changes, and it ends earlier than book two, leaving some key things for the 3rd movie. However, there was A LOT of material to cover in just one 3 hour movie, so I can understand why they did that. As for the added scenes....well, most of them were actually quite good and if they did not enhance the movie, they at least still made sense. Anyways, I won't give anything away for those who have not seen it, but I highly recommend it (yes, that means you Jenny A--get your butt in the theater. I don't care if you need a cathater to make it through, just do it!). Other than that, nothing really new and exciting going on. I have a final today, last one, my final final this semester and then I just need to drive home tomorrow morning. I'm NOT looking forward to packing...or driving in the morning for that matter. I'd drive tonight but I'd rather get in some time with some friends, and also I'm not so big a fan of icky weather driving at night. But I have to be home by probably noon at the latest so I can do an early Christmas with my grandparents. Oh well, it shouldn't be TOO bad. But, now I suppose I should go be productive. Later ;)

THE LORD OF THE RINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE TWO TOWERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ME....GOING TO THE THEATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ....SOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!! :)! :)! :)! :)! (I resort to multiple punctuation all the time....it's just my thing) MIDDLE EARTH! FRODO! LEGOLAS!!! MAGIC!!! ENTS!!! GANDALF!!!! ELVES!!!! THE RING!!!! ......joy....

slowly coming together :)

okay....so now I have commments....but they're rather messed up. I'm too tired to deal with them right now. You can always comment to me about the comments...if you want to....

Research paper? Defeated!!! First exam? Defeated!!! Katie's mood? Vastly improved :) For those of you who don't know what it means to be defeated, you should check out this site--it's fun....at least I think so ;)

Okay...Tricia put in her dream...she told me about it and I read it. Then I took a nap...Here is what follows:

Came home from school, my brother Scott had a surprise for me.... he got a new big black pickup truck... a lot like Jon Wolf’s actually—not that I’ve seen it, from what he said way back when...
And then I was driving with my mother, towards downtown...we were going shopping...but I hadn’t taken a shower that day, and I felt really icky, but we went anyway. Except, I was driving our old van, and it didn’t stop that well...I had to use both feet on the brake al the time. But that was not unusual I guess. So then we drive there. But it was kinda dangerous the whole way... I kept almost hitting cars. And then we stopped at this place downtown; it was sort of like a gas station, but it was an ice cream place. Mom bought me a drink—some kind of soda, no pink lemonade and she had diet pepsi. Then we left there, and I was glad cuz I felt super scrubby. So then we get back in the car, and are looking for this place, this car dealer ship or something. I’m not sure why.
OH! I forgot, back when I was driving with my mom, we switched vehicles part way, and were driving some big station wagon EXCEPT, I was driving from the back seat for some reason. And it was REALLY hard to do. I did NOT like it, cuz I had a hard time controlling the car, and I felt like we were going to get hit all the time.

OH I forgot one more thing, when my mom and I were driving, some stupid driver in front of us, threw a baseball mitt up in the air. It landed right by my head, and I did the little duck and cover thing. And then, we threw it back to him, and he said thank you. That was just weird. And it seemed my mom and I were driving from our home to downtown...even though downtown was nothing like home.

Skip scenes, I’m with Tricia? Not sure...but we were downtown, walking around. We walked into this restaurant, it was a nice sort of place, with a bar, and booths and a lot of people, I mean a ‘LOT and it was evening, and as we were walking...oh shoot, it was actually Jenny A I was with, anyway, as we were walking, we realized that there were famous people here too. We though t we saw...Dan Akroyd...but for some reason that was not unusual, like I se him all the time in town. And we saw...some guy that seemed familiar from a movie...some old guy, and we saw Woody Allen, and...erg, someone else, don’t’ remember. Anyways, then some guy was trying to hit on me, and he was quite drunk and not very bright. H e wanted to buy m e a shot, and I’m like....um...okay, wishing I had said no, but then luckily there came Jenny and I was like, oh, but we need to GO, and she pulled me along with her, using a rubber band between our two fingers to hold us together. So we left. But then

Scene change, we’re at this restaurant, a very small one. It’s like an ice cream parlor...an old looking one lots of wood and stuff. We’re there and then we realize there’s a play going on right there, a not very good one. It’s a kind of community theater, and the not quite so talented artists go there. But there was actually one fairly good singer of the bunch. So the play ends, and the owner comes out and is with all these girls in like old frilly country dresses, and they all take turns bowing, and we clap. Then we decided to get out of there...not sure why, I guess we thought that was weird, but we went out the back way, and that was where all the dressing rooms for these girls were but they were having like a big party back there, it was like cubicles, not rooms and they were doing gymnastics acts, walking on the tops of the cubicles and stuff, and lots o laughing like there was this really big joke everyone got but me, even Jenny, cuz apparently she used to be in gymnastics. Anyways, for some reason Amanda and Nikki are in the bunch, being gymnasts and apparently performers too. And they do this weird contortionist trick, which is just...weird...but anyways, I grab Jenny finally and we leave

We go on to the next place.... we’re at a pool? Only...now it’s Tricia I am with. We’re at a really really big Holiday inn. And we walk through this REALLY nice restaurant to get to the pool. I mean, we look super out of place in sweats and all that. But we do it anyway, its like we’re exploring this place when we’re not supposed to be. So we finally make our way slowly towards the pool. We walk through a couple different rooms with pools, and as we’re walking through the last one, I slip in a little and get my pants went to like the knee. And Tricia is ahead of me then. She walks on through to the locker room. I, being only about 10 feet from the door, and stopped by a police officer in the pool. He says I can’t be walking through the pool areas with clothes on. I said but look at these clothes, they're meant for changing out of, I wouldn’t actually wear them out in public! They’re too see-through and this is a tank top, see? And look, I’m already wet. But the police officer, who I forgot to mention is cute, though obnoxious, says, but you have a third pocket on your back pocket--those are designed for outdoors No matter how hard I try to convince him, he won’t let me go through, and me, not wanting to get arrested, walk back through the way I came, thinking of how I can get there without him noticing. Thing is, Tricia and I did go in the back way, I know there’s another way through.

But the place is SO huge I’m not sure how to get there. I end up walking through another room with a pool, it’s all covered, not in use. Then I keep going, through a door....it occurs to me that I am very upset at this police officer. I was so close to the door, and he wouldn’t let me in, wouldn’t even do it as a favor. So I start taking little things apart in the pace. I knocked down decorations a little, just like big banners and ribbons and stuff, not all the way knocked down, but just enough to be noticeable. I keep doing that as I walk through...I’m in an auditorium now, some kinda nice theater, I keep looking through doors to try and find the stairs I know is somewhere, to bring me either up or down, towards the pool area. I FINALLY find a set of stairs, that goes up, towards the gifts hop for the theater, and there I see a receptionist for the holiday inn, and I go there to lodge a complaint about the police officer. This guy at the desk is also, quite hot. So I talk to him, I tell him that whole story, how I was so close, but he wouldn’t let me through, and now I’ve spent 20 minutes getting LOST trying to find my way out of there, and now I don’t know if I’ll be able to find my friend, since she’ll be all worried about me He looked concerned, though not overly, and said he’d lit the guy know. So then I finally star towards the locker room again, and there’s a new officer there instead, actually...it was the guy from Family Matters the one with Erkel. Mr. Winslow. ANyways, it was the dad in that. But it’s okay, cuz I’m going the right way now, but out comes Tricia from the locker room before I get there...she’s ready to go. Apparently we’re not swimming. I just want out of there, cuz I’m worried about the officer noticing all the taking apart I’ve been doing with the decorations. She brings the car around for me, I run out there...but not before I take apart part of the pole from the stairway outside, and put it on the ground. I don’t actually steal it. What car does she bring around? My old dodge colt. And she’s driving it? So, we start going out of the parking lot, but her driving makes me nervous, cuz it’s my car and there’re a lot of strange drivers round



Anyway, so we’re in the parking lot, somehow, we switch positions. Eventually, the car turns into the car I drive now. Things are looking more normal. And then, we drive in this other. strange area

And it’s Jenny with me again. We're in a very old, dusty looking region...OH YEAH, we are in a nice area of town, with big old historic homes. And we notice a BUNCH of cars outside one f the homes, and signs, and we remember that the governor is having the president over for a big dinner thing. We notice limousines, and the people for the limos are arguing about what color they should be, since there normally would be snow this time of year, but it’s actually nice outside, so they should be white, but if it DOES snow, they should use a grayish color. Anyways, we keep driving on by...then we park. There’s a BUNCH of stuff set up for the president. There’s an entire like historic set. Think of Heritage hill, with all the workers and costumes and old buildings. So yea, Jenny and I are now walking through it. We notice some stuff lying out on the side of the road. Some very funky, old looking boots, and some oven mitts. We put on the oven mitts, and then some lady comes up to us asking if we’ve seen any oven mitts around lately. I said...I don’t think so...and then I realize I’m wearing the matching one to the one she’s looking for. So I give it to her. Then we look at the boots, very cool. I would have tired some on, but there was another lady there, dressed in a maid’s costume from like the late eighteen hundreds, and I think the better of it. She’s one of the workers for the whole thing, and she starts speaking, using the accent from the time.... I guess. So then Jenny and I do too...or was it Tricia. At this point, they keep changing. Anyways, I’m even going into a bit of a British accent. And some other guy is there too, and then, we decide, we have to use the bathroom but it’s kind of creepy place to do such things...for some reason, stuff is decked out for Halloween sort of too, or more voodoo like, but we’re walking around, and we spot one, I have to go really bad, but Jenny runs in first. I complain, cuz that’s the third time that day that she grabbed the bathroom first. And then, I woke up...apparently I really had to go to the bathroom. So that’s it

Yeah....strange dream. Lots of driving, restaurants and a bathroom....I’m thinking I need to go get dinner and to use the facilities.... ;)

I never thought I could miss my journal this much. Not this electronic one, but the hand written one I have...which I left at home. I have to go another week without it. Of course, that also means a week without my address book and a week in which my family has the open opportunity to read it. Granted, my parents don't venture in the basement much, and my brother Scott doesn't come home too much. It's probably safe..and they've never gone snooping through my stuff....to my knowledge. Besides, they know most of what's in there anyway, pretty much. Maybe there's a few details in there, but I try to keep my journal relatively clean--even I don't need to know all the details...I was there, I should remember most of it with a few context clues. Anyways, the point is, I am really getting used to using my journal. Whenever I have a bad day or a good day or am just in a contemplative mood, I go to my journal to write it down. I sort of do the same thing with this journal...but there's something about having to type it up...and also the fact that my friends have access to it...that keep me from writing down some things here. Oh, most of the facts are in here....though they may be ambigious at times. But my journal is like the unabridged version--even though it sill has some censoring. And it's a nice, hand held size, and I use gel pens, which are fun to write with. I can't believe how much life is contained in that one little book. I guess I just can't believe how much has happened since the beginning of this last summer. It's really amazing when I stop and think about it. So many choices...so many times when I could have gone right or left, and all those choices brought me to where I am now. ::sigh:: Amazing. Anyways, I guess I'm going to head to bed. My urge to write has been overcome by my urge to have my wrists stop being sore....I swear I'm going to have carpal tunnel before I'm 25 years old. Oh well, I've got just over 3 more years! Go hands go! ;)

Well, I feel better than I did last time I wrote. Things are still a little confusing, but now that school is a little less stressful, I think I can handle it. But I imagine I will still have my good days and bad days. Last Sunday was just a reminder that I am still going to have bad days now and then, and that's alright. There's a poem by Emily Dickinson that really explains well what I mean by that:

#686 "They say that 'Time assuages'--"

They say that "Time assuages"--
Time never did assuage--
An actual suffering strengthens
As Sinews do, with age--

Time is a Test of Trouble--
But not a Remedy--
If such it prove, it prove too
There was no Malady--

-----Emily Dickinson (1863, 1896)

What I think this means is, that if someting happens and you feel a great loss, you're going to feel pain from it always. Yes, time does heal things, but if it is something very meaningful and difficult, even time cannot heal it. That doesn't mean that I think it's good to wallow in the pain or that it won't be put back further and further in my mind as time goes by. But when I do think about it, it will still be a hurt--nothing can change that. And that's okay, to have a few spots in my heart that do hurt a little if I poke at them a bit. The trick is, to have enough other strong spots in my heart that overshadow the hurt and give me the strength to keep going with those smaller hurts. I don't just mean falling in love again, I mean other areas of my heart, like my love for my family, for friends, for myself, for life itself--all of those things are what make those little cuts worth risking. I just hope I always have the strength and hope to keep taking those risks.

my mood right now can best be expressed by various Staind lyrics:

I try to breathe
Memories overtaking me
I try to face them but
the thought is too
Much to conceive
I only know that I can change
Everything else just stays the same
So now I step out of the darkness
That my life became 'cause
I just needed someone to talk to
You were just too busy with yourself
You were never there for me to
Express how I felt
I just stuffed it down
Now I'm older and I feel like
I could let some of this anger fade
But it seems the surface
I am scratching
Is the bed that I have made
So where were you
When all this I was going through
You never took the time to ask me
Just what you could do...
(Fade)

...So I speak to you in riddles because
My words get in my way. I smoke the
whole thing to my head and feel it
Wash away 'Cause I can't take anymore
Of this, I want to come apart,
or dig myself a little hole inside
your precious heart
'Cause it's always raining in my head
Forget all the things I should have said
I am nothing more than a little boy inside
That cries out for attention,
though I always try to hide
And I talk to you like children,
but I don't know how I feel
I know I'll do the right thing
If the right thing is revealed...
(Epiphany)

...I sit here locked inside my head
Remembering everything you've said
This silence gets us nowhere!
Gets us nowhere way too fast!...
(For you)"

Yeah, this is my away message tonight...Just in a crappy all around mood. I shouldn't be...but last night and today, I've just been thinking too much. Last night when I was out with Mandy, Jenni and a bunch of other friends, I saw Mike. I saw him through the window of Keeters as he, Chuck and Nate walked by. They didn't see me, I think. But I saw them, walk into Caffe Espresso next door. From then on, I was on edge all night. I couldn't help but look wherever we went to see if perhaps they went out to the bars after coffee and would walk into the same bar I was in. I knew there was a chance of it...and it had me paranoid all night. And I knew that if I actually ran into him, things would not be pretty. I have no doubt in my mind that I would have thrown my drink on him and slapped him across the face. I wouldn't say a word to him unless it was a profanity. I wish perhaps that my anger would "fade," but I can't let go of it...not yet. He hurt me very badly. And even though I know my life is probably better for it, the hurt still remains. And then to make the night worse, I ran into the second fellow to break my heart later that night. I did actually talk to him, but he was too preoccupied with friends and a video game to take much notice. I realize we're not going to have a serious convo amid so many people, but I wonder if we would have talked even if we were alone. From the conversatin I had online with him today, it seems he would just as soon forget about it. I wish I could too forget about it, but I hate things that are unresolved...I hate not knowing if there was ever anything there...

I know that it seems things with Scotty should make all this irrelevant, but honestly, I think I need to get some of these issues straightened out before I can fully appreciate starting something with Scotty. He's a REALLY great guy, and I really do hope things develop with him, but I also know not to get my hopes up too much either...I REALLY don't need to have more issues to deal with. That's not to say that I've had the WORST experiences and Oh poor me...It's just that, it's not a fun experience, and as much as I may try to deny it or forget about it, those things in my past are still there....I gotta go, be back

AND THEN!

Of all the computer labs on all the campuses in all the world...she walked into mine
the red-gold haired goddess, rescuing me from my brainless boredom...and her name...is Jenny. Nice of her to drop by the same exact computer lab at 6:10pm...a place I would under normal circumstances be very far away from. So yes, perhaps the night will be aight after all.....Midnight Margaritas anyone?

oh...is it really 6pm now? So it is....it's too hard for me to tell anymore what time it is, what day it is...is it night? day? is Bush still President? Do they really give free food and condoms away on Sunday at Towers social room? ...I just don't know anything anymore. My mind....long ago it slipped into the recesses of wrinkled forehead, prematurely aged like my carpal tunnel wrists. Have I brushed my hair some time in the last 12 hours? apparently not...uneven chunks of my hair sit around my neck in various areas, popping out of my bun with more energy than the whole rest of my body possesses. the deed is done, the never ending spawn of evil has been vanquished...4 days late...5 days spent in mental and physical anguish. How could my friends stand me in the last week? I sure could not.

And is it truly over? ...no...not really....a draft of a research paper due tomorrow. a draft...words that ring like sweet sweet funky ass hard rock music to my ears--Thank you oh professor who wrote those honeysuckle words that are my savior tonight. a draft does not have to be complete, does not have to flow, does not have to be grammatically correct, does not need a works cited page....Oh draft, if I could write a poem to you....I would write you a sonnet...no, too much effort. I would write you a stream-of-consciousness free verse, the words with which I adorn you would fall naturally and effortlessly upon your slacker shoulders.

Rebecca..what the fuck.....is that my name? no....do I want to be called that? no.... ::sigh:: at least he acknowledged my presence...I know it must have been a chore considering how "uncomfortable" he is around me....but I suppose I deserve that after being kinda bitchy to him, but you know, most of that was kidding, and if someone can't take a little harmless banter then :P on you.

Anyways, sorry for the offshooting comment there. Someone just walked in the computer lab that I kinda know. Whatever. So, where was I, oh yes, meaningless (yet poetic sounding) drivel about writing a rough draft. yippidee doo...I'm not into blogging anymore...I'm done now...see ya later ;)

...sweet...

yes it did :) but it needs a little editing...

did it work now??????

I really want to make some changes to my template....but for some reason it's not working right :( Very sad. I suppose it means I'll just have to content myself with the hours of homework I've been avoiding. ::sigh:: I guess....well, sooner I get done, sooner I can forget about my stupid teaching unit. I like the ideas and all; I just don't want to type it all up cuz I know it will take hours to finish. Bleah....See ya when I'm done...which means tomorrow sometime.