Okay, I give up

I've tried and tried and tried to get a blog that is hosted by Tripod, still using Blogger as a publisher. But apparently this time the tried and true "Guess, Test, and Revise" technique just isn't going to cut it. I guess I'll just have to wait until I either learn more about web publishing, or find someone else to help me that does. ::sigh:: Oh well. At least I can change the colors and links on THIS blog.

Lo siento, mis amigos

Hey dudes, sorry I've been MIA for so long. I've been busy doing highly important things like watching TV, hanging out with friends and family, and procrastinating in any way possible to avoid cleaning my room--in fact, that's why I'm blogging right now. Anyway, I love my blog, but it's REALLY in need of major revamping. I'm not quite sure how much it's going to involve yet, but I'm thinking a total reformatting is in order. I'll see if I can keep this same site and everything, but it might be easier to start a new one, as sad as that would be. We shall see in time. That time hopefully being in the next few days. I'll keep ya posted ;)

Sexy At Any Size

Isn't it nice to know that Fredericks of Hollywood supports men and women of all shapes and sizes? I know I'm assured by their catchy little slogan. And for all of those who might disagree, shame on you. I mean, geez, it's just a coincidence that everyone in the catalogue is thin, ripped, stacked and well-packaged.

I'm kicking out fiercely at the world around me...what went wrong?

Tonight I received an email that shocked me. It was from one of my former students, telling me that she tried committing suicide. Her reason? Because she it's almost Valentine's Day and no boys like her. And a boy that she does like just ignores her. AGGH!!

What do you say to something like that? I tried as best I could to write something inspiring for her. How do you tell a 14-year-old that she's not alone in the world? That there's much more to life than boys? That romantic love isn't the most urgent and important thing?

She's a unique and sensitive girl, and her difficulties getting along with others socially doesn't help matters. But God, how do you tell a girl that all of the hurt and pain of being a teenager will pass? How can you tell her that you understand what she is going through? That you've felt those feelings but worked through it and moved on?

I remember those days in middle school, when I had crush after crush on impossible guys who couldn't have cared less. The other girls (aside from a couple close friends) would make matters worse by picking at my faults and insecurities. It's a terrible age. My body was developing, yet it was years before I was really comfortable with my form. And there's so much pressure SO MUCH PRESSURE to be attractive, have a boyfriend, and be a part of the crowd. Those pressures have probably even grown since then, now that young people are being introduced into sexuality sooner and sooner.

But we can't blame society, we can't blame THEM. It just doesn't do any good that way. We've got to work with what we have, help the kids that need our help. Get them involved, get them understanding their potential, get them making goals in working towards those dreams they fear are unattainable. And remind them that family, friends, counselors, and teachers...they all care; they all want to help.

UGH, but does all of that sound like bullshit to a 14-year-old? Can one email from one older friend make any difference at all--make her feel even a tiny bit better? I hope so.

So don't expect to see me sleeping in my bed...

Because I'm up doing some much needed organizing in my room. I simply can't stand it any more. I'm going to clean this dang thing even if it means staying home all dang weekend. ::sigh:: And it will probably take all weekend. But I've got to start somewhere, right?

Where does this sudden burst of cleaning enthusiasm come from? 1) There's nothing worthwhile to watch on TV. 2) I'm kind of tired of my DVDs and VHS tapes right now. 3) My parents are boring and went to bed early. 4) I did'nt feel like getting out of my work clothes today to go out with Shelly or play video games over at my brother's place (he just bought BG2 for Xbox). And 5) My room is so annoyingly messy that I don't enjoy spending time in it. That was the main reason.

I mean, how am I supposed to have the ambition to sit and do some writing, blogging, or scrapbooking down here if I can't stand spending more time down here than my nocturnal activities require? It's like when I lived in EC--I just couldn't get myself to sit down and do homework if there was straightening to be done in my room. Strange, hm? Who'd have thought that I of all people could get annoyed by a messy room? My mother certainly has a hard time believing it. Hey, it's gotta get messy before it gets clean. That's just the way it is. Take my word for it.

Como se dice "I forgot how to speak Spanish coherently?"

As some of you know, I took 4 years of Spanish classes in high school (ncluding 2 years of "Honors Spanish"), earned a membership into the Spanish National Honors Society, AND took 1 year of university level Spanish classes. Well, let me tell you...that just really didn't mean jack when I was trying to actually hold a conversation with fluent Spanish-speakers.

Yeah, I was warned by my high school Spanish teacher that if you don't regularly speak the second language, you'll lose the most of it within the first year. After that, it's a slow decline. And now that it's almost 4 years since my last Spanish class, I struggle even with the most basic of nouns, verbs and conjugations. For instance, today I when asked if I was married I answered that I was only a little tired. Hey, it doesn't help that loud machines are running in the background.

But it's cool cuz some of the workers are making an effort to talk with me, showing great patience with my horrible Spanish. There are a couple workers that actually speak fluent English and they talked with me a little too. If the conversations keep going, maybe I'll actually regain some of my lost language skills. If anything, it made stuffing boxes a little more bareable AND after only 3 hours of brain-wracking, I remembered how to say "to sing."