Ninja: Recovered

I was home for the holidays and survived. There were many opportunities for death and insanity this week, but somehow, I careened past the path of utter destruction and have made it safely back to my newer home. What were some of those pearls of peril?

1. Downhill skiing for the first time in my life. Really, it was more like me trying in vain to stay off my ass for more than two minutes, but hey, cross country has always been more my style. Or more accurately: I'm a wuss. Perhaps I will return to the hills yet this season. And maybe I'll run into my two instructors whose summative age would make them my peer.

2. A mouse who won't die. I set up traps, complete with a decoy granola bar in a box next to a peanut butter laden trap, but the thing just won't kill itself. Stupid smart mouse. I think our mouse has a strong sense of mortality, much like myself (except that my danger senses are overcome by peanut butter and chocolately goodness any day).

3. My parents' living room stuffed to the brim with wrapped boxes, three generations, and three dogs (one, the size of a rat, and two that were surprisingly not overweight by some strange miracle). I'm perplexed that we escaped that torture room with only a spilled beer casualty. Oh yeah, and it'll be bigger next year with Jennifer expecting her first little one sometime next summer. ::sigh:: What's with the profusion of procreation? That is one fad I'll be happy to avoid...for a long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, LONG time.

4. The emotionally gripping meeting of my ancient computer with my trendy laptop. I think my 1999 Compaq sabotaged my stripping of its files due to jealousy of my new younger and much slimmer companion. It decided that a pen drive is WAY too complicated to open and forced me to send files by email instead (after a frustrating ordeal trying to rearrange my dad's cables that WERE fine the last time I fixed them). Of course, that meant that I only sent about six mp3 files due to the escruciatingly slow process of uploading the files into email. On the bright side: "Ninja of the Night" has returned! Try looking for it online sometime...NOT THERE anymore, so thank god for an old evil computer that still has some good in it; I knew it to be true. Now if only I could find defeatyou.com. ::sigh:: Some things just remain lost.

5. Hauling all of our shit up to the third floor. I tell you, after Christmas shopping did not help our cause. My car was full, although I'm certain we could have stuffed more in if we put everything into those vacuum airtight storage bags that seem so handy in those 2am infomercials. Next time everything on my list will be smaller than my head and I will only bring what I am wearing. If it means sleeping naked and wearing a t-shirt and jeans to mass, so be it.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Week

And when is that? Why, Thursday night, just 17 hours away from a much-needed winter break that will last and last. How long is this work-free time period? 2 Weeks! Yes, two weeks of splendiferous late mornings and adolescentless days. (You may ask why I make up words, and I can tell you the answer. I'm an English teacher; I have a license to change the completely irrational "laws" of the English language at will. Like my students would realize the difference anyway.)

Tonight I spent an hour and a half looking for supplies for my teaching "lesson" tomorrow. Let's face it. Tomorrow is going to be hell on earth with kids flying everywhere in an attempt to escape through 2nd floor windows, cracks in the wall, vents in the heater, between tiles in the ceiling--anywhere they could possibly squeeze through to escape the last day of class before a long vacation. They will be hyped on sugar. They will be asking repeatedly, "Can we have a party? Can we have a party?" And just when you think it will be okay, "Can we have a party?" There will not be a moment of peace even during my hour prep period. I can feel the tension seeping into my shoulders already.

Hence, my "lesson" for tomorrow. Here are the details:
Step #1: Take attendance.

Step #2: Spend a good 5 minutes explaining the plan for the day in an attempt to kill time.

Step #3: Have the kids create hand-made cards to give to friends and relatives for the holidays using newly bought construction paper, confetti, glue, magazine clippings, and various other objects they may find on the floor in the classroom.

Step #4: While students are working, hand out old papers, including the recent test they took so that they can make needed corrections.

Step #5: Hope that all hell doesn't break loose while students are using scissors, glue, and listening to Manheim Steamroller's Christmas.

Step #6: Surprise them all with a special holiday gift of a pencil, pen, and peppermint candycane tied together with a piece of difficult-to-find curling ribbon for each and every one of my seventy students (all of which I will put together tomorrow morning before school starts).

Step #7: Thank my lucky stars they are gone for the day, the week, and the rest of the year.

Damn, I am way too good to my students. They should worship me. Really, they should.

A Scent of Accomplishment

So, aside from some sweaty visits to the gym, I have another goal completed: Tricia and I finally finished our game tonight. I think the only challenge about the last battle, or any of it really, was to our patience. It wasn't exactly a bundle of excitement. Granted, it is designed with kids in mind, but I mean, really, aren't these kids better at video games than we are? Still, for $20, it had its moments.

I was going to write more, but well, I think my brain is fried like my old hard drive. ::sigh:: I miss you, Old C.

Oohh, and here's a piece of the past: an new, very abbreviated edition of KRAP (Katie's Random Advice Post).

KRAP: On Stopping at an Intersection

One should probably find out whether one has a car with ABS before driving on icy roads.

The Day After Thanksgiving

What a crazy day. Up at 4am to join the throng of ravenous shoppers packed like salty, sweaty sardines at the local mall? I don't think so. I have a will to live; a will to live sanely...and lazily. Because that's what Thanksgiving is all about: eating a lot of food and then doing nothing for the rest of the long weekend.

Okay, so I'm doing SOMETHING by cleaning up and organizing the apartment. But have I set one foot out of here since last night? Nope, and it's lovely. The snow has been lightly falling since way before we woke up at the crack of noon, which means plenty of shoveling tonight. Maybe we'll think of leaving to bring the mail to the box a couple blocks away sometime before 4pm. I'm SO not sorry I didn't go to GB this weekend. I'd have been driving in snow and arriving there just to leave two days later, probably to have missed all Thanksgiving except the leftovers.

Besides, I just saw my parents a couple weekends ago when they carpooled with Tricia's parents to visit us. That was pretty sweet. I'm getting downright spoiled. My parents have visited twice in the last six months--that's unprecidented since I moved west (even to college in EC). Highlights from the visit?

*Fresh deli sandwiches from the best deli in town: Neson's Cheese Factory and Deli.

*Walking to the Como Park Conservatory and Zoo to see myriad flora and fauna. Various flora and fauna shown below:

*Cooking up a storm with Tricia to create a meal made in heaven for our parents. First course: summer sausage, cheddar cheese, various crackers, and plenty of beverages. Second course: tortellini soup with saltine crackers. Third course: homemade chicken pot pie with hot rolls on the side. Final course: "tunnel of fudge" bunt cake (more like pure fudge brownie that only looks like a cake) topped with real whipped cream.

*Playing my newest favorite card game called "I Goofed" with the whole gang.

*Swimming and relaxing at the Holiday Inn...the hot tub was soooo nice and hot.

*Shopping at the gigantic and over-zealously modernized and decorated Menards.

*Double-deckeroni pizza at Old Chicago. Who would have thought hot sauce was the ultimate pizza topping?

And now, two weeks later, Chris and I are contemplating our next household enterprise. Put up the plastic window coverings or clean so we can put up the Christmas tree? Or just futz around like we've been doing the last couple hours? Hm...tough choice.

Home Alone: The Near-Empty Apartment

With Tricia house/dog-sitting this weekend, and Chris off in Kansas city until sometime this evening, I've had the majority of this house all to myself all weekend long. Not to say our downstairs neighbor is "Nobody" like so many Odysseus's...but he isn't exactly someone I feel like hanging out with except on special occassions, ie our Halloween House party. Hm, speaking of, I do have a few pics I could share. Let's see...

When the mime saw the geeky math teacher, she couldn't help but exclaim, "...!" You would think the mime would be more freaked out by Mr. Wonka and the lamp. Mostly, I'm curious as to where he connected his power cord.


Ah, an advertising dream: After years of heavy competition, Ketchup and Mustard hook up. "I love your smooth yellow bottle." "Not as much as I love your hot red bottle. " Whew! Someone turn off the lamp and give these two some privacy.


Who knew that Willy was a blues guitarist? Or is that a blue guitarist? Either way, there was no lack of entertainment, or candy.


Coach Lee of Burnsville says, "Personal foul, Kagome, for wearing a short skirt that somehow never EVER blows upwards despite being involved in numerous intensive battles, torrential winds, and plummets from impossible heights." Tricia's secret? Skort.


I, Kikyo, have decided that my reincarnation, Kagome, can have my ex-boyfriend Inuyasha and the wonders of Japan's Feudal Era. "Why deal with a stubborn half-demon and nasty monsters when I can have a pro golfer and indoor plumbing?"


I know what this stunning Egyptian queen was thinking, "My husband may be dead now, but wait til he wakes up when I unwrap him after the party."


Fox 9 Investigative Reporting: What fairies and angels do behind closed doors....SLUMBER PARTIES!

Return of the Journalist

So it's been a while. My computer is back to "normal" thanks to campus computer services and about $180...sadly almost 1/5 the price of this hunk of plastic. My students are testing this week which means our schedule is fucked up for two more days. My weight has stayed the same damn poundage thanks to Halloween candy and minimal Y time. My family is doing well and my bro Scott and Jennifer visited this weekend to see Cirque du Soleil: Corteo. My friend Liz has picked out her wedding dress and we've been fitted for bridesmaid dresses.

In other words, MY life and everything in it is pretty much "normal" too at this point. The most thrilling moment in the last week? Using my power drill to screw two pictures on the wall. I could get used to power tools.

Best Bitch

Okay, so I did fall off the face of the earth for a while. Then I chucked a grappling hook upwards and climbed my way back up. Why have I been gone? Truth is, I haven't gone; my computer has. It was at Best Buy for almost 3 weeks. Did they fix it? No. Did they call me to tell me what was wrong with it? No. I called them, I went there, I bitched. End result? I have a diagnosis that the hard drive is fucked up and I need a new one. Best Buy doesn't sell any, but they can order one, to which I replied with an affirmative "Fuck no." On the bright side, my bitching meant a FULL REFUND. Damn straight.

So there my computer sits by my desk, unused and abused by the shitty Best Buy Geek Squad. And they asked on their survey if they should add capes to their uniform? Hell no. That's what SUPERHEROES wear. For one thing, they are as far from uber as humanly possible. Secondly, heroes typically HELP people...when they're not fornicating with various creatures or leaving their wives. (I'm reading too much Greek mythology).

Consequently, the only online access I've been using is at school, and blogging just isn't top on my priorities when I'm spending hours there arranging lesson plans or bureaucratic bullshit. At the moment, I'm borrowing Tricia's computer during one of the moments she's not having to work on a homework assignment, I'm actually home, and we're not watching Inuyasha or playing the PS2. Oh yeah, and I'm sick. Any questions?

Let's hear it for the girl!

On this day in history, a stupendous young woman was born in a quiet city in Wisconsin. Twenty-five years later, we celebrate her entrance into the world by means of a fabulous group dinner at Olive Garden and entertaining party back at her cozy abode. So, raise up your voices in a joyful chorus, shouting for all the earth to hear:

"HAPPY 25th BIRTHDAY, TRICIA!"

I want to stay inside

Seriously. It sucks outside. It's hot, humid, and about one degree hotter out there than it is inside our apartment. That ONE degree is enough reason for me to have barely ventured into the out-of-doors the past couple days. Geez...tomorrow's already Monday...and Sept. 12...shit, we're almost halfway through September. Time is cruising past my window with no sign of slamming the breaks or even coasting.

Last week I began my first official FULL TIME JOB. And I have to say overall: it rocked. Naturally there are kids that are pains in the ass, but for the most part, they're a bunch of good kids I won't mind teaching for a year or two. The only kicker is that I have to make some adjustments for some special ed and ELL students. I found some materials that I think will help, including a history book written in Spanish, so that one of the students has a supplement to her class materials. And I'll find more materials on the internet eventually that will hopefully help fill the gap.

Anyway, another reason I haven't blogged much is because my computer has been really fucked up lately. It will work for a while and then suddenly crash for no apparent reason. It's running a bit slow, but I haven't lost any files and the virus scanner hasn't come up with any hits either. If it keeps on being a bitch, I'm going to wipe the thing and then put the programs back on ever-so-carefully. That's about it for now. I'll try to be more interesting later, but for now I've got to finish dinner and prepare for the new Simpsons and Family Guy episodes. Rock.

Algoma's Shanty Days Highlights...I guess



Note to self: next time WE pick the campsite. No more sleeping on a 15 degree incline. But at least we did "rough it" by camping and then biking into town. Maybe next time we'll try it for more than 24 hours.

Yes, I did dress like my mother for the occassion complete with a lighthouse printed T-shirt and nearly matching printed jean shirt. It helped me blend into the shore town fashion.

Can you guess what interest group may own this float? Subtle, hm?

I'd really love to see a sand castle as tall as the Algoma signature water tower.

I WANT this bike.

As a Nam vet, my dad didn't like this "float," but I thought it was original and beautiful. It stood out from all the rest.

Hey...are those real?

I really liked this Nemo float.

I am more than just a street sewer

The interesting things people say while half-asleep. So this last weekend Chris and I went to WI to see my family and attend Shanty Days in the bustling town of Algoma. Okay, so there's nothing doing any sort of hustle or bustle in that little lake town that has actually decreased in population since my mother lived there. But for this one weekend of the year, the city really shows its shine...or spit and polish.

We had an early morning drive to my parents' campsite outside the town, and then rode bikes on a trail to join together in the festivities with some relatives at my aunt's house. There was a 1.5 hour long parade with all the fixin's, a bazaar of craft booths, a flea market, and a special sectioned off pay-to-get-in portion filled with many unhealthy foods and noise pollution bands. During the day we watched the parade, ate a potluck lunch, bought some crafty junk, walked the pier, and took a tour of my family's historical landmarks.

That evening we crashed in our tent for a slanted nap...our tent was on a hill so we had the "fortunate" opportunity to sleep on a 15 degree incline. After literally rolling out of bed, we went with my parents to the critically acclaimed Pizza Bowl for some very slow but very tasty pizza. Then it was time to break off from the fam and go for a romantic stroll along the boardwalk until we found a good spot on the beach to make out. It was so cliche, I had a hard time taking myself seriously. But it was fun, despite the smell of Lake Michigan.

So all in all, a fabulous, if busy weekend. I miss camping. I used to do it a few times a year when I was younger and in Girl Scouts. I think the campfire is my favorite part--what can I say: I'm a pyro in responsible clothing. Anyone want to light my fire and go camping sometime this fall?

Addicted to Maple Sugar...I mean, Story

Jenni introduced me to this online RPG on her blog a while back, and it took me a while to finally download and try it out. I did a couple days ago and...have played it for hours. I know it's fairly childish and silly for an RPG, but it has basically no loading time, you play with people all around the world, and the animationn is amusing. It's like an easier, very cartoon version of WOW, and the best part is: IT'S FREE!

The plan was to play with Jenni sometime, organizing a party and playing together. Problem is, I can't seem to get a hold of her to organize. So, I've been playing on my own, talking to new people now and then. But I wouldn't mind some company. Any body interested? I'm off to GB this weekend for some fun and camping in DC, but I'm here today and back next week. Just drop an email or send an IM and I'll tell you my character's name so we can hook up and have some fun ;)

Photographic Memories of the Southeast Corner



On my adventure to the "Southeast Corner," seeing Mandy in Madison was first. There was food, there was drink, and before I left there was...a free makeover. This is before.